The Comfortable Familiar

It serves many purposes in my life, some good and some not so healthy for me.

Before I recognized my tendencies to rest in the familiar, I could stay in my nest regardless of the suffering. What I knew was way more comfortable than risking the unknown, in spite of the pain. And that was why, I believe, I remained in my previous relationship white-knuckled, way past the end. It’s what I knew.

I could go back to my hometown, and think to myself, ‘I could come back here and retire!’ I use to do that. For me, most of the things I remember of my hometown were blown away with the tornado last year. The point stands, though, for any who have moved away from an area after being raised there for a length of time. Fond memories breed the comfortable familiar. In spite of the wind, and the heat, and the cold.

I often go with what I know. I stay where I am. I do things like I saw them done.

Which is okay for me. As long as I know that is what I am doing. As long as I know that is my tendency, and that sometimes I need to do push myself to do something else.

If I am aware of what I do, then I can choose to do differently.

It has been a great challenge for me to break out of my comfort zone, and meet some of the challenges I feel I need to risk. Some have proved to be exceedingly simple, except in my own mind. (I can make great hurdles out of customer service phone calls and other situations that call for dealing with strangers.) Others have proved to be more taxing. (I updated my resume last night. The future continues to seem shaky at my place of employment. I feel like one of the string quartet on the Titanic.)

I would like others to take up the slack and fix it all for me. (Hey, Wonderful Guy, why don’t you call HP about my computer?) I love the feeling of being where I know the ins and outs where I am. (I shop at the same grocery store week in and week out, and ride my bike the same way every day!)

But when I break out and stretch and reach, it is always a learning experience. Every time. And what a feeling of accomplishment when I rise to the challenge!

Unfortunately, a successfully made call to customer service isn’t understood as quite the challenge by most people, so my victories sometimes are often silently acclaimed. That’s okay. I know what I’ve done, and that is what’s most important.